I had a dream in the early morning hours after a long restless night.
I dreamed that I was in a mansion with a gracious couple as my hosts. They were kind and warm as they showed me through the rooms of a beautiful and elegant home. As we strolled the corridors and talked in friendly banter, I was shown into a stately library with rich wood shelves loaded with books. It was here that they bid me farewell and left me to make myself at home while they took care of some errand. I remember feeling comfortable and folding myself into a large armchair with a book.
As I was reading, I noticed movement at the doorway. I looked up to see you walking in. You were dressed head to toe in camouflage, a shotgun resting in your right arm and two or three turkeys thrown over your left shoulder. You had a smile as big as Texas on your face...so they must have been Rio's with 16" beards.
I remember feeling so surprised...so happy to see you. I jumped to my feet and ran to you for a hug. I could see the smile on my face matched your own. Just as I closed the last few steps of the space between us and I was asking how you were doing, Rosa appeared at my side and we asked the question in unison...though we could see from your smile and your body language that you were doing great.
And then I awoke.
And I remembered that you are not here.
I tried to make myself sleep again, to return to that room with you just a moment more.
In that semi-daze I imagined us asking you a million questions at once, but you never opened your mouth to answer.
Jim's phone began it's early morning jangling...and I couldn't return to slumber.
I had a dream.
A very vivid dream.
And now I miss you, Daddy, even more.
3 years ago